Today I awoke and realized there are still important people in our lives who may not know what has happened. People we only connect with via text and phone that likely haven’t seen or heard there were posts.
It was akin to catching that freshly formed scab on the doorway as you walk through and suddenly the pain, blood, and tears are right back to when you sustained the wound. The only difference is, it feels like I’m inflicting wounds as well. I know these friends have been blindsided without the chance to have been knowing about what was going on like those who had access to the blog and knew what was happening as it occurred.
I’ll not blame myself for not thinking of everyone while this was all happening, but I’ll also not deny that to hear and read their shock and horror penetrates the part of me that wanted to think that I was prepared, but so very much associates with the shock and horror of it and doesn’t know what to say or where to go from here.
If you read this and can think of anyone who should know, please reach out and tell them or let me know so that I can do so. I am sure there are some whom I am still too much in a fog to see.
Thanks again for your texts, messages and love.